“Let’s
have a bit of a bimble before the Auction”
“All
we have to do is get back in time to get the spuds and the peas on. The pies will be safe enough in the car, away
from foraging rodents (some even with four legs). Plenty of time for a quick trip.”
“Where
do you fancy?” said Malcolm, “We’ve been down Bullpot of the Witches a lot
lately” Head scratching ensued. “I know “ says I, “I’ve not been down
Wretched Rabbit for years. Lets have a
look down Spiral Staircase. I’ve been
reading the route on John Gardiner’s site through to Easter Grotto and back via
the Wretched Rabbit Streamway. I’ve been
down that way many times with Starkers, and up to
Easter Grotto, so all I need to do us to get us to the main drain and then I’ll
remember the way.” In the darkness Nemesis waits for hubris. And thus, here endeth the Prologue, sayeth
Frankie Howard.
Episode 1: Friday night at the Farm
A
few of us are gathered in the lounge chewing the fat over a glass of red. “We’re off down Wretched tomorrow” says I,
”If we’re not out by 5, can you shove the spuds in to bake please.” Al says, “If you’re not
out by then, I’ll think of calling the CRO.”
We all laugh.
Episode 2: Saturday morning
We
get up early, clear headed and leave the farm about 10, just as Sam and Ray are
arriving, and, after a hot and sweaty saunter across the moor, arrive in
Easegill. A small amount of memory
jogging finds us kitting up outside the entrance. I have few illusions about my physical
abilities, so I had decided to rig the drops into the big rift to make it
easier on the return, which in retrospect was probably one of the few good
ideas about the trip. Anyway, we made
short work of the drop and left our SRT rigs at the base of the pitch and went
ahead with a single bag containing food and drink and a bit of camera gear, and
the written description from John Gardiner’s website. We could hardly miss Spiral Stairs, in fact
the biggest problem would be to avoid going down it faster than desired. This was a very easy climb down, and down
onto the cobbles below. Soon we were
admiring the straws in the passage, and romping off down towards the Main
Drain. This is going to be a very easy
fun trip, we thought. We get to the
junction of routes, and take the right hand narrow way to avoid the drops,
ending up sideways crawling until we pop out onto a large dry stone plinth in a
chamber. Here we stop for a few minutes
having a drink and a bar of chocolate.
The
way down into Green and Smelly passage is obvious, so we drop into the rift by
a couple of boulder chock stones, making sure that, if necessary, I can get
back up it. Now we are in Pool Sink, and
this is where things start to go awry.
Well, let’s be honest, it starts to turn into a slow motion train crash.
Episode 3: Saturday afternoon.
At
this point, a sensible person would have made a careful note of the point at
which they left the route back to Spiral Staircase, in order to safeguard their
return. Obvious, innit?
Nope. Not planning to come back this way.
Now we are in Lower T Piece Passage and the size encourages to stomp on
down, following the description. Large
boulder in pool, check. Reverse
Down
a long rift passage we go, eventually leading to a short slither through a stal
grille to emerge in a streamway. WTF! I
look around blankly, confused. The
passage stretches off in both directions.
I mentally toss a coin and we head upstream. There’s that feeling growing deep within my
bowels now. After a short distance,
we’re wading through pools, and crawling in the stream. Not right.
So we turn around and retrace our steps, back up through the stal
grille. Maybe I didn’t take the correct
right. So back to the elegant pinnacle
we go. Next right is a cobble choked
passage, so we continue down the main way.
We
emerged on the side of a smooth large streamway. To our left the stream vanished into a nasty
looking choke, with an old digging bucket jammed in it. This became a familiar sight to us, and
probably managed to stop things getting into the realm of the apocalyptically
awful. To the right the passage
stretched out into darkness. Can’t go
downstream, so must go upstream, looking for Holbeck
Junction. On we go, up the stream way
until... we see a passage coming down through a stal grille on our right. We turned around again, when we saw four
lamps coming up the streamway towards us.
It was Sam and his party. All
will now be well again.
“Hi
Sam”, I greeted him, “Where are we?” “In
the main drain, just a few metres up from Holbeck
Junction.”
We
swopped pleasantries, and I tell him we’re off down to Eureka Junction to come
out of Wretched Rabbit Streamway. Secure
in my knowledge now, we part and head in our separate directions. Five minutes later it occurs to me that I
hadn’t asked where they we planning to come out, or more to the point, if we
could tag along with them. This time I
notice the slope leading up into a huge cavity on the true right, and scrambling
up, we find four harnesses left on the top.
The harnesses left, we assume, by Sam to pick up as they returned. Confidently now we drop down the boulders on
the other side and head off towards Stop Pot.
I
was beginning to realise by now that my memories of Easegill were rather hazy,
but my clear recollection was that Eureka Junction was at stream level, so we
stayed as close to the stream way as possible, crawling below the boulders, and
trying to stay to obviously trafficked routes.
Several dead ends and improbable looking diversions, Malcolm speaks up,
“Why don’t we go back to Holbeck Junction where the
harnesses are, and wait for them to come back, and go out with them?” The first sensible idea all day! Unfortunately, whilst retracing your steps
sounds very easy, in this part of the system, we found it took quite a while,
and a few circuits to get back to the ridge.
No harnesses there. Ok, sensible
plan no.2 is formed. It was about 4:00
pm at this juncture, so all we had to do was to abandon the idea of a round
trip and just saunter back out Spiral Staircase again, and we could see where
we’d actually got to on the surveys back at the Farm. Down to the Main Drain again we went, turned
down stream, turned into the inlet by the barrel choke. We dodged the familiar
obstacles in the passage, round the back of the boulder and into a chamber with
a small stream in it. Into the first
inlet – chokes at a small chamber with a couple of boulders jammed across a
rift – that was not the way we came down, so we went back into the passage and
further up. Several passages branched
off but none of them seemed familiar.
Then it dawned on us. We were in
for an embarrassing wait.
Episode 4: Saturday Evening
Thus
we decided to settle down and wait for assistance. Running around and dancing the headless
chicken would just waste energy and end up with us lost in some obscure inlet
where we would take ages to be found.
People knew where we were going, where we were last seen and when we
should have got back. So we went back to
a chamber just off from Holbeck Junction where we
were out of the draft and there were some dry, more or less comfortable shelves
to sit on and began to wait. We shared
our last Mars Bar and sipped a bit of juice.
As the cold began inevitably to seep into us, we huddled together for
body warmth and shouted out occasionally, more for something to do, to at least
feel like active participants rather than passive spectators. It was also in response to the sounds of the
cave. You get the strange feeling that
there are people talking to each other just at the range of intelligibility, a
low murmur you just can’t make out. You
shade your light for a second, hoping to see the dim glow of a distant lamp and
yell out. You know, of course, that it
is the sound of the stream, but it might, just might, not be.
After
a while, about 8 o’clock, Malcolm came up with a new idea. There is too much “white noise” in the cave
for yelling to have any effect, so he took the Darren Drum and started beating
out dance rhythms on it with a crab.
This was LOUD! By now, we hoped
that we would have been well and truly
missed, and help would be on its way.
Episode 5: Saturday Night
At
about 9 o’clock, the low murmur from the
stream noises changes to a definite “hello!”.
We shout back, and yes, people are responding! Soon lights appeared, and resolved themselves
into Ray Duffy, Alan, Tim and ... I’m so sorry I can’t remember who the fourth
person was... First question to Ray was
“ Did you bring any fags?”. No, but he
had brought some nicotine tabs! A cup of
sweet tea and a boiled sweet later we set off to the Wretched Rabbit Streamway
via
And
back to the Farm, for tea, food, beer and the inevitable ribbing. Grateful for the assistance of everybody from
RRCPC and CRO, we are able to relax and reflect. So now I am sat at home with my laptop, what
have I learnt. Well, that the Ease Gill
system is a very confusing place to navigate if you have little prior
knowledge, secondly if you’re offered an out by somebody who does know where
they are, stick to their backs like glue!
Thirdly, if you do get lost, sit and wait in as prominent and
comfortable place as you can and wait for somebody to find you, provided of
course, that they know where you are and when you expected to get out.
And
us? Yes we are going back, you’ll
recognise us, we’ll be the ones with a big ball of string and a guide dog.
Martin Fagan